We started asking mum and dad a few days out when was Bertie arriving. They kept telling us so many more sleeps, what they forgot was that we have sleeps during the day, so of course we were counting these but we were not meant too. Anyway the day eventually came and we were allowed to go out to meet the plane after mum and dad had finished work.
We had to wait ages, there was even enough time for mum and dad to have a cup of coffee, the big bird people are mean cause they wouldn’t let us go behind the big sliding doors to find Bertie. Bertie’s sister arrived soon after that, so we talked to them for what felt like ages before finally we saw Bertie and his mum and dad on the TV screen. It was so good to see him, sorry them again. It had been just so long since we had had Bertie over with us on holiday. All we could say was – Let the adventure begin
We all went back to Sister Susan’s place for tea and while the humans ate their dinner Bertie, Mr Wrinkles and I sat in Bertie’s room and talked and talked. We were still talking when mum came to find us and after we gave her the, do we have to go look, she let us stay with him for the week.
All to soon it was time to go back home, but we didn’t mind as Bertie and his mum and dad were coming with us, as tomorrow we ventured forth into the great outdoors – well to Cunnamulla anyway. We met mum and dad and Uncle 2 Bob up at a huge building called Garden City. We thought it was the size of a city but couldn’t find the gardens. Anyway after dinner dad, rushed back to work, but not before sending us to do some buying chores. When we got back to the shop we had to sit around, as we know we are not allowed to run around in the shop, and watch the silly humans (Bertie’s mum and dad) try and find guns for the weekend that they thought might shoot straight for them. When will they realise that they actually have to do something about holding them fairly still while keeping the sights aligned while squeezing the trigger. It is a basic thing this shooting but humans do try and make it hard for themselves.
After the gun panic was over we decided to help them load the car, but when there are five humans all trying to do the same thing it is safer to sit to one side and watch. We eventually got home, but had to blind fold Uncle 2Bob so he could not see the way to our new house. Do you know how slow humans drive when they are blindfolded, well we do now!! Tomorrow would be really exciting, we could hardly wait so we decided we would sleep in the car so no one could then forget us.
It was still nighttime when our humans got up and ready. But soon we were on our way. We thought it was great as we were going to drive in convoy all the way out and back. As normal, mum and dad had far too much stuff to take to be able to have any other humans in the car with them, so Uncle 2 Bob took his car as well. But don’t worry we could fit in either of the cars.
This trip was really strange. It was probably the slowest we have ever driven out that way, but it felt the quickest in time, even though it was still about the same time as normal. It must have been because we could change cars if we wanted to whenever we stopped anywhere.
When we arrived and found our house, we all grabbed beds and then had a cuppa. After a rest we all went out to the range to say hi to all our shooting friends. After rushing around saying gidday, we settled down to have a good chat and then it was dinnertime. Yum. We love coming to the Cunnamulla as Aunty Jean and Aunty Liz who do all the cooking don’t mind if we lick the plates clean for them. Aunty Jean said she has six of my brothers now, cool aye. Aunty Pam and Uncle John arrived just before dinner and we were so pleased to see them as we hardly see them now, but they brought their grumpy Caddy with them. She is always grumpy, not like us happy dogs.
Soon after dinner we all headed home for a good nights sleep, at least some of us were going to have a good night as Uncle 2Bob was sleeping with Bertie’s mum and dad, so we shared the room with my mum and dad. After Sydney, I never want to hear a snorer like Uncle 2 Bob again.
The noisy people woke us up nice and early on Saturday morning crashing around their house, must have been trying to wake Uncle 2Bob up I reckon. Anyway we got ready and drove out to the range to meet the others for breakfast. After a good healthy feed of barbeque bacon, sausages and eggs, the best sort of breakfast for a shooter as it gives them a good grip on the ground, all the humans went off to shoot. Mum stayed and helped do the dishes left by the hungry hordes, we offered but Bertie’s mum made us go and help them shoot. Boring, we would much rather be off doing things that dogs do, that is what this trip is all about, doing what you want to do.
Well we tried to humour the humans all day, but I have to say it is getting very tiring being expected to do all this work for no reward. We did however get some justification during the evening. After we had all eaten our fill of the superb 20 course evening meal that we have become so accustom to, I sat back on one of the very few spare chairs and watched the human race at work. What can one say. It was scary!
One thing that I did really enjoy watching, and mum had to point it out to me, was seeing the men humans doing the dishes. Mum thought it was so good that she had to sneak over and take a photo just so you all out there would believe us.
We had another good nights snooze. Mum did a bit of tossing and turning and next-door where Bertie’s mum was sleeping, well they were so noisy. All night they seemed to be banging and crashing around the place. I don’t know if it was from the broken bathroom door or from Bertie’s mum trying to stop the others from snoring. But it didn’t matter to me as I knew that I could catch up on any lost sleep while dad was shooting the next day.
With the racket from next door we didn’t need our alarm to wake us up, so as normal we were all ready to go early again. Out to the range did we venture only to find some of those that did not sleep there were up and about. So yes at last we were allowed to run around making all the noise we could. As we whizzed past the grumpy dogs house she came out to chase us, but we are just tooooo light on our feet and she didn’t even get a look at who we were. By the time we got back to the Barbie our brekkie was cooked. We gobbled it up as we thought we should be quick just in case grumpy came over and decided she wanted it. Fat chance!!!!!
I have decided that this shooting lark is not so bad. Mum and dad take me to clubs that have really good tucker and then while they are shooting I can sleep. They say I am meant to help them with their shooting, but it has all become so boring that I can now sleep while looking like I am awake and interested. It took a while to learn this technique, but it has been all-worthwhile. I am now trying to pass on my secret techniques to Bertie and Mr W.
I managed to fill in my day yet again with pretending to help mostly dad with his shooting, I try not to show any favouritism between mum and dad, but it really hard when dad is the one that needs the most help. However I do sometimes go and help others that I think could do with some special attention. But then when thinking about it, I would never have any time to sleep if I was to help all those that needed it, now would I?
Another fun filled day was had by all. It is amazing the stories you hear around a range just after people have finished shooting. One thing I have learnt in my short life and that is the biggest word that humans use is “if”. They are always saying, if I had done this or if that had happened, I just can’t work out why they just can’t accept that they have stuffed up and be done with it until next time when they can do it proper.
Any way it was all too soon and we were sitting down around the tables trading the stories from the day. Now this is the time that I can really find out all the gossip and who is telling the truth or stories, most tend to tell stories. The only trouble is I sometimes get caught when I sneak up on groups as this blasted bell I have on me rings and gives the whole game away. I will get rid of it one day.
All too soon after another glorious meal it was time to take the weary bodies home to bed. This was our last night in the noisy broken down house. Next year I told mum and dad we had to find a better place to stay. I suggested Aunty Jean and Uncle Herb’s place as that is where a lot of the good cooking comes from, but it was soon explained to me that if I stayed there I would have to sleep outside as their dogs are not allowed inside and anyway how could I even think of sharing a house with Uncle Chappy.
After another sleepy night we again woke to the music our neighbours made. We must get neighbours that don’t have a bad door. We packed the car yet again, well I supervised anyway, but someone has to do it, and out to the range we drove. There was not a lot on this morning, so when we got there Gran went and asked Aunty Jean if she could make us some sandwiches so we could have a picnic on the way home.
All too soon it was time to say goodbye to everyone. I was sad, as I never want to go back to the city. Deep down I am a country dog, but I grin and bare it to keep mum and dad happy. Still it is only a few weeks till the next shoot.